Should I Be Concerned?

While walking to the subway one morning this week, I met a new neighbor.

He was hanging out by a tree looking fairly harmless....that is, until you got close to him.

He looks a bit shifty, don't you think? And, what is with that pencil mustache and chest tuft? I didn't want to say anything but he had his pants unzipped. I'd watch the kids closely, if I were you.